Ten Days

What’s ten more days –
Six months have already passed.
Just ten more spells
for ten more days,
ten more bargains to be struck,
ten more nights to lie awake.
What’s ten more days
With six long months already passed?

 

I like the repetitive pattern of a triolet and have used it here, but the form does not follow the iambic pattern, nor is the rhyme scheme accurate.

This was written for the One Stop Poetry ‘One Shot Wednesday’ in response to the news that D’s return from ‘the front’ has been delayed for ten days.

 

Posted in Family, One Stop Poetry, poet, poetry, Uncategorized, war, writer, writing | Tagged , , , , , | 10 Comments

Strange and strangled bio

All I wanted was a short bio to insert in the front cover of the next print of Random. Nothing complicated. Surely not too hard a task for someone supposedly good with words?

It was a tortuous process. I stopped and started, fed the dogs, fed the birds, went to Tai Chi….surely that would calm me and give space for simple words to fill. But no, when I returned to my keyboard, nothing would come that didn’t sound like a conversation between Mrs Thatcher and the Queen.

Tea, that’s the answer. Then write it as if it’s about a stranger, in the third person. That didn’t work either. It emerged as a strange strangled paragraph. Even more so when transposed into first person.

I couldn’t creep up on the words by distracting myself with a bit of light dusting, nor could I force them out with a spell of mindless digging in the veg patch. Nothing came. Nothing at all.

So I dragged in a photo and underneath it reads in small text,

‘Sally J Blackmore – I write poetry….but not biographies, thumbnail or otherwise.’

Posted in poet, poetry, Random anthology, Uncategorized, writer, writing | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

Don’t You Dare

Picture reproduced by kind permission of Fee Easton

Don’t you dare feel sorry for me!
I can do whatever I like,
so you don’t need
to feel sorry for me.
My life is my own,
this whole town is my home,
and I take my friends as I find them.
So ditch your pity – walk on.
Keep your snide
sideways glance
to yourself.

Don’t mistake me
for a sad, junkie looser –
see – these are my poison of choice.
They won’t kill me today, or
any time soon, and besides,
from the look of your miserable
mealy mouthed
sneer, those tell tale lines
round your Avon
glossed lips, you aren’t averse
to a swift drag yourself.

So, don’t you dare judge me
with your clip cloppety shoes
and your Clarissa Bell scarf,
yes, I know who you are,
a home counties clone, with your
middle-management drone of a husband,
a safe two paces behind.
Just like Mum, before she spat out my Dad.
So just toddle off home,
and don’t dare
feel sorry
for me.

This is based on the Fee Easton photograph (see above) prompt at One Stop Poetry Sunday Picture Prompt Challenge

Posted in Family, inspiration, One Stop Poetry, poet, poetry, poets, Uncategorized, writer, writing | Tagged , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Minimised

No call today or yesterday
in fact nothing for over a week.

It’s not that I’m expecting the call –
not that I think it’s my right.

More that I know, if they’re minimised
then some poor soul’s lost their life

or his legs or an arm, has a hole
in her chest, or maybe she’s lost her sight.

So my fingers stay crossed for the phone to ring
for then everything’s under control,

My fears are allayed, but much more than that,
They’re having a safe, quiet night.

 

*Op minimise is when there is a communications blackout from the war zone because of casualties.

 

Posted in Afghanistan, Family, poetry, war, writer, writing | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

King John’s ancient meadow

Runnymede meadow slumbered under a moody March sky this morning. This photo was taken towards the Commonwealth Air Forces Memorial which perches on the hill in the background. I love the rays of light streaming on to the grass, bright green with the first growth of spring.

As usual I was aware of a breath of ancient history, a melding of past, present and future as I passed alongside the sward of green, and gave nod of recognition towards the memorial to the signing of the Magna Carta and the J F Kennedy memorial.

I was on a mission to visit the art gallery which is housed in one of the Lutyens gatehouses at the Windsor end of the ancient watermeadow.

Gary Rogers, artist in residence and curator of the gallery, kindly allowed me to use one of his original paintings as the cover to ‘Random’, my first book of poetry ( some of the poems and the cover can be seen in the Poetry section of this blog). His work also inspired the poem ‘Tribal Lands’ which is included in the anthology. I was pleased that he liked the book when I showed it to him and overjoyed when he ordered copies to be sold at the gallery.

The call of water is always too strong for me to resist and so I perched for a while on a damp, windswept bench and watched the river slide lazily by. I whipped my camera out again to catch what looked to me like a grebe on the far bank, but succeeded only in snapping the mallard.

With chilled fingers and hair blown into a knotted nest, I made my way back to the car park via the sculpture garden.

By strange luck the only car park that had been open was the one housing the small cafe, and so I warmed myself with a mug of Earl Grey tea before setting off home. As I left, I couldn’t resist one last photo of the darkening sky.

Posted in birds, poetry, poets, Random anthology, Runnymede, wildlife, writer, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Fish Pie is off dear…

The day after…once again I have ‘day after lag’. Yesterday I drove the furthest I have for probably 6 years, to Hailsham and back to celebrate my Mum’s 80th birthday. That I could do this at all is a minor miracle…but that I was also together enough to celebrate when I arrived was astonishing. By the time I completed the journey home, I was exhausted, but triumphant.

At last it seems that I have found a small key in dealing with the M.E. and much though I hate to admit it, pacing and routine are the magic wands! Every period of activity is followed by one of rest no matter where I happen to be! This may mean taking a sneaky sit down on  whatever presents itself – a wall, a chair in a furniture showroom, the edge of a raised display in a garden centre, a kerb…anything that is in the right place. I no longer care if people look askance, nor do I respond to tuts if I am slow, or If I lose words in the middle of a sentence. I understand that to the eye, I don’t look as though I am struggling. I might seem selfish or unhelpful, or just plain daft, but finally I have learnt to put myself first to ensure that I actually get through whatever I am trying to do. So if you see a seemingly fit and healthy person stealing a quick sit down in the shoe department, or abandoning a shopmobility scooter to search through the racks, with no seeming or visible disablement, be kind to them, it might just be me eking out the last drops of energy to fulfil a mundane task.

As for the birthday – we had a good time. For the first time in years it was just Mum, my sister and me, and we laughed a lot. Mum trying on shoes was hilarious and required both S and myself as props, footstools and boot removers, together with an array of long handled shoe horns for leverage. We left without shoes, but with a handbag! Mum did not want to try on shirts, and after the shoe scenario, I decided she might be right. So I selected what was possibly the right size and modelled it for her, over my jumper, in the middle of the store.  That was good enough, Mum said, so they too were added to the packages. Lunch was a reasonably simple affair, though Mum did choose the one thing on the menu that wasn’t available, but that was a minor hiccup. Choosing our own thank you cards for presents we had brought with us was a fine moment. Then came the saga of the replacement toilet seat.

We entered the shop on a mission, having no idea whether fittings were ‘standard’ and relying on Mum’s imperfect memory to choose the right style and the right colour. So far so good. Home once again, we discovered that the colour was as far apart as double cream and pink champagne, so we should probably have chosen the shade called  ‘ivory’  instead of ‘ warm apricot’. We also discovered that the screw fittings on the back of the seat are reverse threaded, and that the fittings on the new seat had at least three different positions, and we tried all three before hitting on one that would not pinch the users bum as they sat on the wretched thing, or snap in two because we had it on upside down and unsupported in crucial areas.

Still, the day was successful, fun and I managed to get through it reasonable in tact physically. Mum was happy. and had a day to chat about to her cronies, and hopefully to remember with fondness.

Posted in CFS, Family, M.E., miracles, writer, writing | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

One Stop Poetry – a triolet

When another soldier dies

I always think about their kids,

their mothers, fathers, husbands, wives .

When another soldier dies

what arc of pain from that demise –

so many lives that hit the skids

when another soldier dies.

I always think about their kids.

Posted in death, endings, Family, heroes, poet, poetry, poets, war, writer, writing | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

The Morning Show

If I doubted that Spring was on its way, the activity of the birds in the feeding tree this morning made it absolutely clear.

The dawn choral society is practising heroically every morning, polishing their performance, each songster shaking off the dregs of winter- night chill and running through their scales, repeating short phrases until they are perfect to their ears.

Naturally such sterling performances require a good breakfast. I can barely keep up with the demand for food in the feeders.  I currently maintain 5 large seed feeders and 3 more for peanuts , two dedicated to the fatball officianados, plus two large tables and a ground feeder, every one of which I fill in the morning and top up late afternoon for the late supper crowd. It has almost reached a point where a third fill is required after the early morning rush.

I am richly rewarded for my efforts to feed the bird population of Surrey however. This morning I stood at my bedroom window, which is a mere foot away from the branches of the feeding tree, and so is level with the queueing area for birds waiting their turn to scoff. I watched a myriad of chattering blue tits bicker over their place in the queue, only to be scolded into behaving by the arrival of two great tits, who had obviously got out of bed on the wrong side. They, in turn were flummoxed by the arrival of the long tailed tits.

This was my first sighting this year of these wonderful, apricot chested puffballs. They travel in small, excitable packs, full of exuberance and just knowing how beautiful they are, what a spectacle they make as they dart and dip in complicated synchronised flying patterns, in, round, over, through the wintry weave of bare branches, feeding, gossiping, showing off. They bring a smile to my face, a lift to my heart.

Suddenly they scurried off and all was quiet for a split second and then I saw why – a pair of majestic, beautifully plumed jays flew in, settled, preened and darted looks in all  directions, warning off any bird reckless enough to approach the tree while they were in residence. Large and serene, they knew they would remain unchallenged – a good job as, though impressive when sitting on the branch, they were ungainly and awkward as they attempted to feed on the nuts. Thus are the mighty cut down to size!

With a backward glance, as if to make sure that no bird had witnessed their less than stellar performance, these too left the tree and all was calm. My peripheral vision picked up movement. The dogs are out, I thought, and was about to move away, knowing that the show was over, when I realised that none of our dogs slink quite like this.

I had to ask myself the question – what am I actually seeing here? It took a second or two for me to realise that it was a beautiful, glossy vixen. She moved with hushed but potent energy along the top of the low wall, hoovering up the scatter of seeds spilled from above, and the small pile that remained on the tray, left by the ground feeding birds, possibly hoping it would be there for elevenses. No such luck today. The vixen, almost without breaking step, had cleaned up, then, seeing that there was nothing more for her, she left, with no backward glance. Poised, magnificent, she had taken what she needed and moved on.

Seconds later the chattering blue tits returned, the day’s normal pattern resumed. My private showing was over for the day.

Posted in birds, dogs, inspiration, natural world, wildlife, writer | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

I wish we could have sung for her…

It was a fitting day for it,

sun shining bright and hard

in a flinty sky.

The bitter wind chilled hands

so they could be warmed by

‘why do we only meet at funeral’ handshakes.

 

Gentle words spoken, memories

given wings to bestow

butterfly kisses on tear

dampened cheeks. Silence

weighted, shared, bound us

in the reality of her passing.

 

I t was a fitting day –

I just wish we could have soothed her with a song.

 

 

Posted in death, endings, Family, funeral, poet, poetry, song, Uncategorized, writer | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Shaggy dogs and heroes

That a brave young soldier died of the wounds he incurred while working with his dog to find weapons and explosives is more than sad, it is distressing.

Only a week or two ago I read  of the work these handlers and their dogs are doing in Afghanistan to clear explosives from the ground, to the benefit of soldiers and civilians alike. The number of civilians, often children, maimed and killed by the IEDs laid by the insurgents is depressingly high. I read of a dog and his handler who had discovered a record number of arms caches and explosives. A man and his dog whose six month tour of duty had been extended because of their success.

Pictures of the dogs, often spaniels, though not exclusively, showed exuberant animals with flag like tails and bright , intelligent eyes, bounding ahead of their handlers, full of verve and a love of life. The handlers spoke with love and pride of the work their animals carried out with unbounding energy.

I surveyed my motley crew of five dogs, who sit when asked and come to my call when it pleases them and marvelled at the untapped ability of dogs in general and the willingness they have to work with us; their loyalty and desire to please; their capacity for fun and work, and not caring which task was which.

I would say that we like to think they love us, yet experts say the don’t – they just follow the leader and work with their ‘pack’.

And then, this week, I read again about the same record breaking soldier and dog team. Lance Corporal Liam Tasker (26),had been shot and killed while working with his dog, Theo, a beautiful Springer Spaniel, in the prime of life.

And Theo died immediately afterwards of a massive heart attack.

Now tell me that dogs do not love, and grieve.

My heart goes out to Liam Tasker’s family, friends and colleagues.

Posted in Afghanistan, death, dogs, Family, heroes, poet, poetry, research, Uncategorized, war, writer, writing | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment