The One Stop Poetry task for today is to explore the use of rhyme and so I have a villanelle (ish) to offer…
English Seaside
Ceaseless, surging, the ebb and the flow
Of icy water assaulting the sand –
Salty, tangy, lip-licking glow
Of face and finger, nose and toe.
Seaweed, old plastic, afloat in a band –
Ceaseless, surging, the ebb and the flow.
Seagulls that skirmish, they swoop to and fro
Skimming the wave tops, dive bombing the strand.
Salty, tangy, lip-licking glow
On the knuckles of bait diggers hunkering low
Filling old rusty buckets with shovel and hand –
Ceaseless, surging, the ebb and the flow.
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Oh, this I like. It moves and surges just like the waves it describes. Well done!
thank you for commenting. Encouragement is so motivating.
Thank you – glad you enjoyed reading it enough to comment
it is supposed to be a fun poem and yet there’s a sad undertow..pulling at one.
probably caused by the (usual) British holiday weather!
it is the undertow that make the sea, and poetry, such a challenge. Thank you for your thoughtful comment.
So many of us seem to be turning to the sea today. It’s as though we received a memo. I’m always confounded by these co-incidences. I guess they don’t just happen in Dickens’ novels. I loved your poem and the clever and unforced way your rhymes seem to naturally occur giving that rhythm of the sea, echoing sound after sound. Beautiful. I’m not sure I’d call if a villanelle. It seems unique enough to me for you to name it as your own. Really well done.
Thank you Gay for your kind words…maybe the rhythm of the sea is best described utilising rhyme…
“Ceaseless, surging, the ebb and the flow.” I like the sound of this, so I’m glad it’s the repeated line. I dig that the poem feels like waves crashing. Good work! 😀
Thank you – the repeating line was one of those that taps you on the shoulder and says, ‘Hey, I’m here, now write me!’
Thank you Matt. My concern with this one is that it seems to end abruptly, but maybe it has to as there is never an end to the sea…
Clever use of the rhyme in this !
I too like the ebb and flow !
JL&B
Thank you…I enjoyed the challenge of rhyming
oh i felt the tides in your words…really nice flow and rhyme scheme…
125% agreement in this surges nicely like the ebb and flow it describes 🙂 and love your adaptation of the villanelle form 😉
Monty / bummy
thank you Monty – it’s naughty but nice to adapt forms don’t you think?
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